In a recent conversation with a friend, I said something out loud that struck in a chord in me and I felt as if I had uncovered a small piece of what makes me the person I am.
I said – fear and insecurity are two distinctly different emotions and while one can feed the other, a person can be very secure but fearful of something.
What do you think?
Fear is defined by Merriam-Webster Dictionary as, “to be afraid of (something or someone.)” Insecurity is defined, as “deficient in assurance.”
Some of the debate centers around the connotations associated with these two words. For example, the word “insecure” has a more negative connotation as it feels as if it is tied more closely to emotions and to feelings of jealousy or envy. The word “fear,” while also having a negative connotation, feels more closely tied to an innate reaction to a dangerous situation – something that can not truly be controlled (although many argue it can be overcome to a certain degree.)
I would argue that fear and insecurity are two distinctly different emotions. A person may be very confident and secure in whom and what they are, while at the same time very fearful of any number of things that drive and/or influence who they are as an individual.
Can the reverse argument be made? Can a person’s fear drive insecurity? Absolutely – but in this instance that is a much more scary prospect. A person who is both insecure and fearful has cyclical and compounding issues.
Ideally we would all love to be secure and unafraid. I would have to say I envy J anyone who achieves such peace. It seems – and perhaps this is naïve on my part – that conquering fears is easier than altering assurance perceptions and insecurity.
I think my message to my friend was that perhaps we all are too hard on ourselves and sometimes we feel insecure when in all reality the emotion we are feeling is fear and not insecurity. If you start to understand that you are secure in whom and what you are as a person but are afraid of particular aspects of your life then you have the confidence to address those fears head on and challenge yourself to overcome them.
If you assume you are insecure then will you ever have the confidence to address your fears? I could discuss this one for hours…
