Naomi Marr.com

Five somewhat warped inspirational thoughts.

November 23rd, 2009 No Comments

Many people in my Twitter stream quote inspirational thoughts. Although the five I’ve gathered over the past week aren’t the same caliber as those quoted by John F. Kennedy, Abraham Lincoln or Martin Luther King, they are inspirational just the same (in a warped kind of way), so I thought I’d share them with you.

Give them a chance, they’ll grow on you.

1.) The roof tells the story.

Last Thursday night it poured down rain. Buckets of rain fell and woke us out of a sound sleep on numerous occasions. Friday morning it was still raining just as hard. That morning, while walking the puppy, I realized that the contractors working on a new house next door to us were working feverishly to finish the framing. It was pouring rain. Those house framers didn’t seem to mind one bit – radio playing music, generator humming, nail guns pounding (no one uses hammers anymore), a damp chill that had to be worked from your bones so it didn’t take over, and a new home being built for one lucky family.

This same day, I saw at least five people in my network post comments on Facebook similar to, “today is the kind of day you just want to curl up in bed and go back to sleep.” I have to admit the thought crossed my mind, too.

What’s the difference between the house framers and those who want to hide from rainy days? They had purpose. That house build had meaning to them. I found out just today from speaking with one of the builders, that one of their crew (a father and uncle to some on the site) had passed away three weeks ago while building that very house. The rest of the crew wanted to finish it in his honor. Their commitment is now permanently visible on the roof.

I’ll make a very broad generalization and say that maybe some of those folks (myself included until I took a bit of the builders’ purpose and decided to push forward) who wanted to curl up and sleep the rainy and cold day away – lacked a driving desire to work for, toward, because of, or in spite of something. Find a purpose.

: Our Neighbor’s Roof

2.) Want to feel good about yourself? Watch the Jerry Springer show.

A colleague of my husband’s, who was out of work in the past, concurred with me that Thursdays are the worst day of the week when job hunting. It’s the low of the low and she said, “I never thought about it but, now that you mention it, if I got all the way through Thursday soaps operas, Oprah and to the Jerry Springer show, then I knew it was going to be OK. If you ever want to feel good about yourself, watch Jerry Springer.”

I got to thinking that her approach was not so different from mine. I have been job hunting for 5 weeks now and have yet to turn on the television, but one of the reasons I have been getting more involved as a Hospice volunteer and just generally donating more food, money and time during this work lull is because it keeps me grounded with reminders about what is really important. For some it’s Jerry Springer. Thanks, Jerry.

3.) I love this shirt so it will fit.

This inspirational thought is courtesy of my five year old daughter who is trying to deal with the fact that her favorite shirt is starting to get a bit tight. She’s had it for three years. The innocence, optimism and sheer naivety of the comment has encouraged me over the past five or six days to just say “yes” (ala the Yes Man movie) to a few things in my life. Some believe that you make the life you want so if she can make her shirt fit then I suppose I can take steps toward achieving what I want in life.

4.) 90% of social media is just showing up.

This one comes courtesy of @BostonMike. Many might think it is common sense, but in the social media space I think there are a lot of people who don’t know this fact or seem to forget it frequently. For geeks (I am one) social media is an easy way to connect with others, but if you don’t EVER show up in person then you’re missing out on half (I might even say ¾) of the fun.

Extrapolate this idea out to the rest of your life and you’ll be amazed at how your relationships are deepened just by showing up and participating in person with your friends, family, and colleagues. Be social.

5.) Ring the bell the next morning.

It’s an @billrozier statement, for sure. And it’s so true. I haven’t heard him say it recently, but the basic concept can be applied to any number of situations and it runs through my mind frequently. The context for the phrase is – go ahead, play hard. But just be sure you’re there to ring the work bell the next morning. Be present and have your A-game ready. It also has been inspirational to me in times where something has gone wrong and it would just be easier to ignore it and forget about it. And that doesn’t just apply to work situations. It can also be helpful when dealing with situations involving family or friends. Ring the bell – face it head on. Play hard, live hard and ring the bell.

Job hunting? Sleep through Thursdays.

November 16th, 2009 4 Comments

I’ve been in the job market for 4+ weeks now. It’s an odd market. I am both lucky to be in it, and — at the same time — very unfortunate because employers are tapped for resources, hiring cycles are longer and we’re coming to the end of the year.

Give it a chance. This really is a hope-inspiring post.

I have found that the job hunting week goes something like this:

MONDAY - it’s a brand new week. You’ve got some things lined up from the prior week’s work and you’re jazzed to tackle this new adventure. You remember how lucky you are. You are having excellent conversations with many very talented and smart people in your industry. Meetings about web marketing, communities, and the social medias are exciting and participatory discussions these days. It’s not every day that you get 4+ weeks carved out from your job to go learn. Good things await you.

TUESDAY - it’s a working day. Tuesday is one of those days for which you often schedule meetings, interviews, lunches, and networking events. Time flies and Tuesdays go by fast.

WEDNESDAY – it’s the second working day of the week. It flies by just as fast as Tuesday and for the same reasons.

THURSDAY – it just bites. You realize – Holy crabgrass, Batman! – another week has escaped you. You’re still unemployed and while you’ve learned a whole bunch – that doesn’t pay the mortgage. The conversations you’ve been having all week haven’t materialized in any booked meetings for next week and you’re not sure how this is going to play out. Thursday is the day it becomes all too real. You’re frustrated, scared and sad.

FRIDAY - It’s a new day. Yes the week is over, but now you have Saturday and Sunday to step away from job hunting – to take that much needed break. Some meeting or interview or conversation you had earlier in the week somehow pulls through to more work for Tuesday or Wednesday of the next week and you’re off and running again.

So what’s the best way to survive Thursdays, you ask?

Some people sleep through Thursdays. Some people take Thursday off – no job hunting. Some people drink on Thursday and start the weekend early. Some people get sucked in by the emotions and begin the downward spiral into depression.

I say — live Thursdays. I have come to understand that it’s the day that I won’t feel so great. That’s OK. The other days I don’t let myself get down. I keep my positive attitude. On Thursdays, I acknowledge where I am in the process and allow myself to work through all the emotions that go along with my new adventure. Don’t get me wrong, Thursdays bite, but even I know that if only 1 out of 6 days is cruddy, then those are pretty good odds.

Feel what you need to feel on Thursday, go to bed early and be ready for Friday. Friday is a new day.

Six finger silent treatment for marketers

November 12th, 2009 No Comments

During the pilot of “Cougar Town” (Judge me. It’s OK. I think it’s a funny show!) Courtney Cox gets angry at one of her co-stars and holds up six fingers. Five on one hand and just the thumb on her other. Her co-star quickly retorts, “Oh, what? So now we’re not talking for six minutes?” And, the silence ensues…

I laughed and my husband just shook his head. Probably because he knew at some point in the near future he’d be subject to the “six finger silence” method. I had laughed too hard to let it just pass by without using it!

It got me thinking, though, about all the different situations in which I could use the six finger silence method — and the six minutes of silence I often wished I got from marketers. Communities and social medias allow us the luxury of doing our own research on a company or product and I wish that companies respected this new order of things. Prospective customers need the six hypothetical minutes of radio silence while they process all the information available to them and before they start being marketed at. I say “at” instead of “to” because as Brian Halligan at a recent AMA Boston event said, “we’re all just sick and tired of being marketed at.” We no longer have to sit on a couch and watch a TV commercial because we’re too lazy to get up. We have remote controls now and we can change the channel.

I wish some companies (you know who they are – the obnoxious ones sending you repeated email blasts and call you several times a week when you’ve never even indicated an interest in their products) waited until I raised my hand and asked for direct information. I wish instead of marketing at me, they observed six minutes of radio silence and focused their time and energy on creating content that the masses could consume, react to, and provide context for all of the rest of us doing our research. Then, when we were ready, we could raise our hand and receive their marketing information.

They could preserve their highly-valued prospect database and only market when they had important things to say
They could take advantage of using the lower cost community and social medias to create and propagate content that encourages people to raise their hand as a prospect
I am a happier customer because I’m receiving the types of content and marketing information that works for me

So, to all those companies that market at me – with no regard to frequency or how disruptive your marketing techniques are — I give you the six finger silent treatment while I go off and talk to your existing customers to see if you’re worth it.

PS – I am a Marketer.

What were YOU doing two Thursdays ago? It’s tied to your social media success.

November 10th, 2009 2 Comments

Before getting to how this post relates to success or failure in social media, I have to set a bit of context.

Self-inflicted memory loss – seriously?

You see, I have a good friend who amazes me. He remembers the most specific details about all the people in his life. He can rattle off birth dates, phone numbers, numbers of kids, companies and positions held, family names, hobbies — you name it. Without skipping a beat, he would even be able to tell me what he was doing two Thursdays ago. I am fascinated by his ability and mentioned one time, that, “I can’t remember anything and I use lists and files to keep track of everything.” To which he responded, “Naomi, it’s really quite simple. All you have to do is concentrate.”

At first I was put off by this comment. As if I didn’t concentrate? I mean – who was he to suggest that my memory issues were self-inflicted? I certainly was not about to delete my very detailed Microsoft Exchange contact list and Excel-based “To Do” list in lieu of my untapped brain power recently released because some nitwit [whom I really do respect, so I say this in only the nicest possible way ] told me to concentrate.

Shortly thereafter, though, I found myself standing in a large circle at a work event getting introduced to a bunch of new people. I decided to test my friend’s grossly oversimplified “concentration” approach. I wanted to know, if I really put myself into the conversation and into being present – in the then and now – of the discussion, if I could remember the new people without having to ask their names 2 or 3 times before finally getting them correct.

Wouldn’t you know it? It worked. And I’m not being facetious when I say that. I had truly and honestly used this crutch I called “bad memory” for years. I got away with saying things like, “I’m good with faces but not names.” Or, “I can’t remember that address or their phone number. It just doesn’t stick with me.” What a bunch of malarkey!

It’s amazing what I can remember now that I often put on my concentration hat. I don’t let myself use the “I’m never going to remember that” crutch anymore and I can easily focus, listen and retain information. Deciding what is important to remember and what isn’t is a topic for a different day.

This is where it gets good!

It’s the ability to retain information that brings me to my point about social media and remembering details. Social media is about concentrating on the details of personal interaction. This is very pertinent to business conversations because at the root of all business conversations, is still a personal interaction.

Your network of social media connections is this web of interconnected people. All with different and complex stories, backgrounds, and details. Those that are the most successful at social media are successful at what I call “social media concentration” (and I don’t define success as a large following). They have personal interactions every day all day and they remember details from those interactions. They recall the memories during subsequent interactions and when introducing people to others. It builds credibility and respect because they know their network and can speak about them easily.

Here’s your takeaway.

Try it. Immerse yourself in a conversation with someone in your social media network. Converse as usual, but concentrate on remembering important details about the conversation. Bring those details back to a subsequent conversation and see how much more genuine it is on a second go-round – all because you concentrated. Try it with personal, face-to-face interactions, too. It’s worth it.

I want to work for you. Please talk to my Mom.

November 5th, 2009 7 Comments

When I was managing the Progress Software web development team, I traveled to India and spent two weeks interviewing and hiring a team of web developers in Hyderabad, India. It was one of the best trips of my life but I’ll leave that for another post.

Many of the candidates brought family with them. Not one family member, but many family members. And they didn’t sit in the lobby and patiently wait for the interview to be over. They were active participants in the interview process. Sitting in the room with their son, daughter, brother, sister or cousin. Listening to the questions and responses. Nodding their head in agreement or subtly shaking it from side to side if something was said that they didn’t like. At first this threw me for a loop, but as the days progressed I got used to it. It was just how the interview process was handled in India at the time. Companies were chosen by families, as much as companies chose candidates.

I have been job hunting for 4 weeks now. One of the many things I’ve learned during this process, is that I am awful at verbalizing my worth and how I can help a prospective employer. It has reminded me of my trip to India. I know what I’m capable of, I know I can help, I know my background and I know my skills are excellent. But I stink at verbalizing it. I hear other people talk about me. About the work I’ve done. About what I’m capable of — and people seem crystal clear as to how I can contribute after listening to them.

So – for the prospective employers I’m speaking with…I want to work for you. Please talk to my Mom and she’ll tell you why I’m worth hiring.